Would you have sex with someone who is in an open relationship?

And here it is, yet another snow day.  Let us jump into some sexual relationship conversations, shall we?

It is no secret how I feel about monogamous relationships  - I think they’re a tad bit ridiculous. However, I realize and respect that monogamy is a major desire for a lot of folks.  And I’m not knocking ANYONE who HAS a healthy, empowering, freedom-giving, awesome-sex having monogamous relationship.  I just hope that folks dig down real deep and ask themselves why they desire monogamy (or anything in life for that matter).  Is it because you watched

mommy or daddy cheat and you think monogamy is the best way to circumvent that hurt and pain?  Is it because you’re a jealous person and you think jealousy in a relationship is sexy?  Is it because you think people who are not monogamous are whores?  Is it because your God and/or spiritual text said you have to be…?  Or the one I love hearing the most (insert sarcasm here): if you want to have sex with other people you should stay single.

Scenario: You’re single.  You meet someone, have kick a$$ conversation, and share a few flirtatious exchanges. An unspecified about of time goes by.  You look up and find yourself wanting to throw your drawls/panties/manties/underwear at them  (i.e. you’re sexually attracted to them).  Before anything pops off, you find out that they are in an otherwise monogamous relationship but are allowed to have a “hall-pass” so to speak.  This hall-pass allows them the freedom to have safe sex with other people as long as they communicate this desire to their partner (as outlined by their relationship standards). Would you have sex with them?  Why or why not?  Would you feel bad for doing it? Would you want to verify with their partner that this was some real sh!t they had going on? Would you feel liberated about it?

 

Court is now in session!

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4 thoughts on “Would you have sex with someone who is in an open relationship?

  1. In the situation you lay out no I wouldn’t mess with it. It just involves more people then I really wish to deal with. Regardless of the couples “Hall pass” rules or whatever it’s just not my thing. To many unanswered questions for me.

    In regards to Monogamy, I want it ideally because that’s what feels right to me. Didn’t come up under any cheating parental situations. Nor do I think it will prevent pain. Its just me. I’m single with no obligations to anyone. When I find a person to enter a serious relationship with I’m giving that person all of me. Not most of me with allowance to slide with another.

    If that works for others then hey cool. I’m learning just how different the strokes are for different folks.

  2. Shay Boog says:

    Hmm opening yourself up to an open relationship—some may think, “oh well hey their partner is fine with it than so am I”! But I believe behind door #1, there is a nice package of “At what cost are you willing to do it? There’s always a cost to something. For some guilt—trying to justify their way into the situation that has been presented to them, then there’s reality…ahem STD’s…safe sex doesn’t mean they can’t get it…(or what if the other partner slipped up and didn’t use protection and gave it to their partner.–(Yall seen Four Colored Girls don’t play lol) And If you’re a Christian-1 Corinthians 7:2- basically says “because of this temptation..get your own wife/husbands. For this conversation we can put that “wife/husband” context and say “get your own man or girl”! There are how many people in the world that are SINGLE, with no attachments yet you want someone that is already with someone? Interesting (not judging lol). Then you think about growing pains..is this a hit and quit it deal ? How long are you really ready to go the distance with this? Because jealousy can start to creep in…man I can go on lol I guess the question anyone should ask themselves is “How are you going to feel about yourself after it’s all said and done?” If nothing…then I guess then there’s nothing to talk about. Do you boo lol #livelife..do people still say YOLO? lmbo

  3. DCHill says:

    Within my core there is always an interest and excitement even, to want to have deep connections and a passion to understand how my love feels and why they feel the way they do. So at the very least, it potentially bring about some good loving conversation. What I call “lovegrounds” are necessary. I feel compelled to say as the hypothetical single party, I’d need to know all parties are a-okay. Relationships with women matter too much to me, even those I am not intimately connected to.

  4. Fabulous Nerd says:

    You’re single. You meet someone, have kick a$$ conversation, and share a few flirtatious exchanges. An unspecified about of time goes by. You look up and find yourself wanting to throw your drawls/panties/manties/underwear at them (i.e. you’re sexually attracted to them). …. This is the nature of all my relationships that are REAL and TRUE! Yet, I am strictly monogamous. If there is no sexual attraction, then the relationship may not amount to more than colleagues. This begs the question, do you have to consummate the desire to make it real? Intense passion and desire continues to be an aspect of my relationships with my besties and keeps us very engaged in each other’s lives. To some folks an open relationship is the optimal one, that has not been my experience. The one time that I did step out, the “single” person wanted to become the partner and the relationship has never been the same–years later! On the other hand, the universe is knowing to be curved …..

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